Five Actions to Kickstart Your Relationship Forward in 2018

The other night, Time Square had a crowd of freezing bodies anticipating the ball drop without giving much thought of the year ahead. Although kisses were exchanged under the 10 degree brisk winter air, many couples are still left questioning their own relationships. While New Year’s resolutions are being written down, primarily focused on self-improvement strategies, some relationships from the past year are moving forward in the wrong direction.

Recently, I was live streaming on YouNow.  I was guesting with a young woman, in her early 20’s, struggling to keep her emotions together from an unhealthy relationship. She is currently engaged with the man of her dreams, but his family does not approve of her despite everything she has done for him. She even dropped out of college to pursue their relationship. In the past year, he has cheated on her twice under his family’s approval, awkward – I know, and still considers to wed in the near future. She will be consuming alcohol on her 21st birthday. She is not yet legal age to drink in the United States, but she will most likely use emotional distress as a reason to legally indulge in this behavior. Additionally, she has briefly mentioned that she occasionally takes her engagement ring off. This alerted everyone in the chat, and many questions lead into an intense discussion on relationships. Here are the five imperative steps to adapt to any relationship in 2018.

Communicate 

Communication is a process of sharing or exchanging news and ideas. In a technological world, many people struggle to communicate effectively. In some relationships, there is little to no communication at all. For 2018, find ways to talk to your partner about everything happening in your life. It could be as simple as describing the bird you saw in the park to the senior couple holding hands at the mall. When you begin to develop new ways to share information, you will feel more comfortable with yourself and the people around you. While considering the appropriate time and location, always say what you feel, if you feel that it should always be said.

Express 

We are all humans, and we think and feel alike. Some thoughts and feelings are difficult to express because of the nature of how they feel mentally and emotionally. Can we accurately measure happiness through adjectives, or can we substitute them with nouns, like butterflies? Can gestures or conduct convey the right message if there is nothing else to be said? Whether we have an easy time expressing ourselves, or find it rather difficult to open up, a healthy relationship requires a mature established connection to surpass the indescribable feelings. We should never take an advantage of words that may sound appropriate, or words that we know other people want to hear. We should only express how we feel, and accept nothing in return. Love and lust should never be taken the same way, or misinterpretations can lead to empty promises. Lastly, never feel inferior to family or friends for expressing yourself in front of your partner. Always take a stand on defending them when they need it the most. This will provide reassurance that they can rely on you when conflict arises.

Engage

Occupy, attract, or involve someone’s interest or attention with the most genuine intentions. Never assume that engagement is the same as consent, and never take an advantage of the consent of someone allowing the engagement. If you have been in a relationship for a long time, you are extremely comfortable with your partner. This comfort may lead into misinterpretations and mixed messages that it is perfectly acceptable to do as you please and please as you do. Marital status does not, for any reason, reflect entitlement, ownership, and willingness to another person. For example, not every single woman is eager to be with the next single man.  Not every married couple has the right to their partner’s body simply because they wear rings representing their martial status. Take your partner places, see the world differently, and step out of the norm this year. Engage with each other to develop bigger and better things for your relationship in the years ahead.

Develop 

The most fascinating concept of development is the implication that something must grow, and become more mature, advanced, and elaborate. The only small print in development is within the definition of the word. Maturity is when something is fully developed. Your relationship must grow to become mature.  Advancement is to move forward. Could negative movement in a relationship qualify as advancement? Of course. It is only advancing in the wrong way or direction. When a relationship becomes more elaborate, it has a complicated yet beautiful structure of carefully arranged details. It shows that the couple has developed something purposeful and healthy. If you have to question the development of your relationship, from communication to engagement, you need to step back before you become something unbearable.

Become 

A relationship is a connection of two entities sharing similarities and differences. Whether you want to become friends, best friends, a couple, an engaged couple, or an official married couple, you have to finalize boundaries and expectations. You have to know what is in store for you in the near future. If you are struggling to fill an emotional hole now, it will not be filled later. You need to fix this today. You cannot become anything other than what you are today, unless you change something about your current situation. If you want to grow with someone, you must communicate, express, engage and develop into an achievable martial goal. Never rush being friends to being engaged, or simply rushing the wedding to obtain official documents. A relationship is a journey between two individuals who have both mutually agreed upon the path they are willing to take. Respect each other, and watch for verbal and non-verbal signs. These signs include lack of communication, distance between each other, and fiddling with engagement rings. The minute someone takes off an engagement ring could be a sign of dishonesty and trust, but it may also be a sign of discomfort and  If someone is going out of the way for you, take into account that actions do speak louder than words. When you reach what you anticipated to achieve, you become what you deserve to become.

I wish the best of luck in all your endeavors for 2018.

 

 

 

Five Actions to Kickstart Your Relationship Forward in 2018

Allons-y, mon chou!; Encouraging Terms of Endearment After Valentine’s Day

happy valentine's day
happy valentine’s day (Photo credit: mugley)

Salut, ça va? J’ai beaucoup des mots doux d’amour aujourd’hui! Hey, how are you? I have a lot of sweet words of love today! In the last two months, I prepared everyone for the upcoming Valentine’s Day, or Singles Awareness Day (S.A.D.).  Are you excited? Whether you are trying to find love online or you have that prospective lover already engaging in no strings attached snuggling, you might have to encourage more to your man than just keeping up with his qualifications.

Guys, my blog suggests romantic tips that will ignite a house fire from candlelit seduction or the freshly sparked ideas that will leave your lover begging like a feline in heat. I am not advocating that you should follow everything just for one night, but balance everything out for post Valentine’s Day. Your beautiful lover deserves more than just a holiday obligation for public displays of affection.  Never save up all your paychecks just to take her out for one night out of the entire year! Seriously, time to wake up and smell the roses before you buy them. Guys, this blog post will help you rekindle your relationship butterflies. Just promise me one thing. You hereby agree to the terms and conditions of relationship success. These terms include, but are not limited to, effective communication with your partner.  I cannot emphasize enough on communication. If verbal communication curtails your fullest relationship potential, body language is also misunderstood as well. If you cannot understand your lover’s body, please refer to my sensualist perspective approach before moving forward this year. When you are ready to take the test, study the erotic study guide. Ven aquí, Pablo Piccasso! Her beautiful canvas is ready for inspiration! No, just kidding. First, let’s focus on communication before and after Valentine’s Day. Then, go ahead. 

Sweethearts Box
Sweethearts Box (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Not Desperate, Just Be Mine!

On Valentine’s Day, talk is extremely cheap, corny, and sometimes very sweet! However, be extra cautious to sink your taste buds into something your valentine has yet to say! A relationship, regardless of its status, requires communication. The lack of communication raises red flags before someone’s heart is severely wounded. If your man cannot express terms of endearment, maybe giving him a box of Sweethearts was the worst inspirational idea you ever had. Guys, these candies are not meant for pick-up lines for one-night stands. They should encourage you to think outside the box (pun intended)! 

Guys, if you need some help on explorative writing, please feel free to check out my page before you open up on sugar-coated terms of endearment. Make your lover a priority, not an option, especially once a year!

Be Original 

A woman craves originality over physical intimacy.  Physical intimacy is extremely exciting, especially with strangers, but there are some consequences with marriage. You will end up married for 50 years with someone you passionately love, but you might not function the way you do when you were in college. If you have originality before Alzheimer’s disease takes over, you can still play your Shakespearean role in her life without rekindling your intimate newlywed adventures. Romeo, Juliet wants the poison from thy lips! If you can still spit up a few honest romantic lines, there will be a much happier ending with your love story. If you can do that while you rev up your rusty sex life, you may just have another chance between the hips as well.

Poetically Captivating 

It is perfectly acceptable if you cannot write anything like Shakespeare. I am not asking you to become the next Robert Frost either. The road you should take (pun intended) is from your heart. Practice does make a lot of progress if you show your sensitive side and begin writing how you feel every day. If you can recall back from earlier in this post, I recommend clicking on the word, “qualifications,” to review the emotionally sensitive section of that post. It is perfectly acceptable if you are sensitive about the way she feels about you or how you feel about her. She wants a well-rounded man, and being sensitive does not make you weak. It is simply the reason why you are her man. Start another WordPress blog for poetry! I have one! If someone provides you with constructive criticism or encouraging words, take them to move forward. Everyone expresses their own feelings through writing, music, and art. If you like music, you enjoy reading words that touch your innermost feelings about everything around you.  Just try it. Deliver the autumn breeze softly across her neck, and the sensual touch of a passionate embrace from a summer ray upon her flesh. You’ll understand. Trust me.

A Major Award [1091]
A Major Award [1091] (Photo credit: brianjmatis)
It’s Fragile! Must Be Italian!

A Christmas Story does not have a Valentine’s Day Story edition. So, please, never make it one! A personal recommendation for anyone trying to rekindle relationships is to learn multiple romance languages. Seriously, you will learn how to use patience and passion within everything you say. Go to the nearest book store, or Google foreign terms of endearment, or watch YouTube videos. Your possibilities are endless. There are no excuses to learn! Allons-y, mon chou! Guys, always remember to practice what you preach (pun intended)! Confidence sounds sexy! When you are confident in speaking another language, your lover will notice your determination. If you are successful, you may just have a romantic night outside of Paris! You might have a busy schedule, but learn how to organize time for a phrase a day while you do your daily routine. In the shower, start singing a phrase. It helps when the phrase is almost relevant to what you are doing. In Spanish, try saying, “Cuando yo tomo una ducha, yo pienso de mi corazon dulce.” It will eventually come to you. Trust me. You got this!

Pets Are Not Included 

You can have pet names without owning a pet! It is extremely healthy for couples to follow the pet naming trend for naming each other something cute for a change. No, I am terribly sorry, but “asshole” is not acceptable. However, there are plenty of pet names trending in different cultures for dating and relationships. Babe, what are your favorite pet names?

In the article, “Pet Names” Are Important for a Strong RelationshipJohn Tesh mentions how coded language can also help secure a healthier relationship. When your partner says, “Hey dear, I’m burning up inside,” never assume they want a fan! If they do, you might have to assume they want that autumn breeze I mentioned about earlier. Do you have a coded language or sugarcoated language with your partner to discuss things around your friends or family? Although I find this very effective, I barely find anyone else to join the fun. One last thought about pet names – try using their names as well! If their name is Laura, call her Alaurable! If her name is Kerry, grab a cup from your little Kerrig to start calling her Kerrbear.

Ladies, the next time your stud muffin wants to go back inside your oven, make him spill his heart out. Give him an incentive to make him crumb back for more!

Questions: 

  1. Do you have any plans lined up for Valentine’s Day? Are they better than last year?
  2. How do you spend a Valentine’s Day with (a) someone you love? (b) a crush? (c) family?
  3. Do you prefer unconditional love over materialistic love? Are you the type to pop the balloons, and embrace on the chocolate kisses? Was it embarrassing to carry around stuffed animals in school?
  4. Do you have a favorite pet name you love giving or receiving?
  5. Do your friends or family give you pet names?
  6. Did you know while I was writing this blog post, I just reached 9,000 hit views? That’s less than 3 months!
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Allons-y, mon chou!; Encouraging Terms of Endearment After Valentine’s Day