One Month Blogiversary; A Monthly Summary of Success

On November 12, my Facebook friends boosted my self-esteem and enthusiasm to pursue writing a romance novel. This positive energy sparked Prinze Charming.

The first blog post is always awkward. Imagine yourself walking into an empty auditorium with a spotlight shining upon the stage, awaiting for your arrival. While you look around for a sign of life or hope, you crouch down wondering why you even bothered. Then, the thoughts come. Yes, those thoughts.

“I’ll write something inspiring. If anyone sees it, great. If not, obviously I need to advertise before I seem like I enjoy talking to myself. What? Me? I don’t talk to myself, do I? Am I? Oh, right.” My second blog post became much more popular over the last thirty days. What could have caused that turn out? Possibly when I wrote something more inspiring and breathtakingly moving:

“She’s pinned against the wall with care, penetrating fingers through her hair. Our eyes greet, noses glide, lips meet, and tongues slide.”

The first day felt different. My feelings about becoming a blogger were neutral. What else would I expect from this experience? I have established many other blogs online since I was in middle school. Occasionally, I pay them a visit and feel remorse over my deleted Expages.

The following week before Thanksgiving was extremely busy for me. I received an interview only a day after I submitted my CV. Yeah, a red flag award for Most Responsive. The marketing firm called my cell phone, but I decided to let it ring. I never bother with people calling my cell during the day. Why waste my paid minutes? My home phone number is also on my CV. Please try again later. The minute I saw the phone number in the search results, I became extremely enthusiastic to return the call. I am a conversationalist and the woman behind the other line knew exactly what I was capable of doing for their company. Effective marketing pitches. The phone call concluded and the preliminary interview scheduled for Monday morning. Yeah, Monday. This was Friday, and they requested Saturday. No thank you. 

Monday was a very exciting day for a recent college graduate. This was my first legitimate interview after concluding my collegiate studies. I live nearby the public transportation routes that connect the suburban residents into the city. As I waited for the bus at the corner of my street, I realized how ridiculous I looked outside in a suit shortly after Election Day. What the hell was I missing? A campaign sign. 

The first interview was a success! The manager who conducted the interview knew that I did my homework on the company. I accurately answered all the questions, and provided a few on my own. As I walked out the door with confidence, I glanced back through the transparent glass door. “Ha, that’s competition?”

The bus ride back home was extremely overwhelmed with confidence and a sense of direction. Then, my purpose in life expressed itself through the voice of an innocent little boy. After analyzing my well-suited appearance, he finally mustered up enough courage to ask me a question. “Are you … a secret agent?” My heart melted into a puddle of bliss and evaporated back into my thoughts about my future career. Yes, I want a government career. I would love to become an asset for our country and gain that rewarding opportunity to use my linguistic skills that you read on my “About Me” page. That is primarily why I studied Political Science. His mother might have given him that influence by watching crime scene investigations or action packed secret agent shows on television, but situations like this happen for a reason.

What the hell? I would rather watch soap operas, like the Young and the Restless, than watch the clock for a phone call. “If you don’t hear from us by 4:00, please understand that it is a friendly reminder that we did not feel that you were a qualifying candidate for the position.”  When the phone rang around 3:55, I knew they wanted me back. We scheduled Tuesday for the next interview because it was convenient and I wanted to show consistency.

Let me just speed up this moment with the following events on a timeline: Bus ride, dead cell phone battery, a sudden increase in hope and dependency for the Stop & Shop clock mounted above the entrance, and a long day selling AT&T services to Cox users in fancy neighborhoods. Wait, there is something missing. It will get back to me soon.

Yeah, if you read that as, “The bus ride back to the second interview, carrying a dead cell phone battery in my pocket, lead me into the path to a door-to-door marketing day selling AT&T services to Cox users in fancy neighborhoods” – you are absolutely correct! It was over seven hours of no compensation to see how this marketing firm works with the client’s consumers. Yeah, congratulations, you qualify as a marketable man. Wow, now I know exactly why I passed the first interview! The candidates signed a contract that we were aware of no compensation. Well, at least the women brought me to KFC. Oh, that reminds me,

I rekindled chivalry. 

That story requires verbal context. No, really, I must have explained this story over twenty times to everyone concerned about me not having the job after all those successful interviews. Me?  Overqualified? Yeah,  what do you expect from an entry-level marketing position targeting recent high school or college graduates? The salary is solely based upon a commission based salary only. When someone mentions that there is an average pay of $400 to $600 a week, that means you can fall below or above. Hence why this position is competitive and flexible. Yeah, hierarchical management sounds extremely intriguing. Moving on.

My Thanksgiving post was very warm and heartfelt. I wanted more feedback from it, but not much attention was on it that day. That was completely understandable. Why would anyone  be blogging all day on Thanksgiving? Then, I was trying to relax from the second interview and Thanksgiving. So, why not share a picture of a backyard campfire? Yeah, not my best quality, but it was last-minute. Sorry. I was debating if I should create a photo blog or not. I will let you know as soon as possible!

On November 28, I decided to write a How-To guide on “L.O.V.E.” which stands for, “Listen, Organize, Value and Express.” If you have yet to read it, do it soon. The positive feedback on it was greatly appreciated! Thanks!

Ah, yes, the following day inspired me to write something beyond 1,300 words. OK, 1,313 exact. My article, “The Ultimate Sacrifice for Love; Makes Sense to Deny Participation,” increased my views and my comment records. It was truly inspiring that I received a response recently this week about it. After that article, I knew I should write quality written articles. I knew my audience was craving something to read that revolved around relationships. On the third day of December, I found more inspiration.

At a record high of 2,067 words, “A Lover’s Christmas List; Top Five Things to Do in Decemberwas born. The feedback was warm and engaging. Thank you for everyone who participated.

Now, this article motivated me to test my audience and their playful sides in the bedroom. I was actually extremely hesitant to publish something explicit on here, especially with my last few articles that maintained and balanced seduction. Although the likes were low on this, the star ratings and comments were high. Ladies, I completely understand, you were way too busy imagining, “The Art of Seduction,” that you decided to bring your laptops back into bed with you. That was very sweet. Thank you. By the way, the record high thus far is at 4,406 words! Yeah, I guess I was too engaged with this one.

Now, let’s get back into a warm comfy mood. It was a pleasure to see that most of my hopeless romantic followers were also snuggle enthusiasts! My article, “No Strings Attached Snuggling; The Trending Sensual Intentions Surrounded by Sexual Misconceptions,” gave everyone a warm feeling inside to reach out to someone or something. Yes, teddy bears are perfectly fine! At 2,226 words, I conveyed a really warm emphasis on sensual importance over sexual importance. I hope everyone has a snuggle buddy this holiday season! However, it would be extremely awkward if you snuggled with someone who had bad breath!

Coming in with 2,018 words, everyone seemed to enjoy hearing how to keep their mouth shut about ignoring a perfect moment of a passionate embrace! My article, “Lips Are Sealed; Holding Off a Perfect Moment with Bad Breath,” set me apart from the rest! As soon as I received a comment, I continued to go ahead to start my next post.

As a recent Blog of the Year 2012 Award winner, I felt extremely honored for the nomination and time in reading my posts. A distinction in my writing was found and the rest truly pushed me forward. Then,  my heart grew even bigger when I received the label of being “gentlemanly” on cherispeak‘s Bloggers I Like page:

“An amazing blog of gentlemanly and sensual writings that men could learn from and women will melt from. All that aside, Tony is hands down one of the best writers I have ever had the pleasure of reading in my life. Considering I have read millions or even billions of words, this is saying a lot!” 

Cheri Roberts is an amazing woman with a big heart, a spontaneous personality, and a nurturing side when you need someone the most. Thank you so much in everything you do. I could never ask for a better friend. Ms. Roberts submitted one of my latest articles on OpEdNews.  This article received a lot of great feedback and restored memories with nearly 40 comments!  By four words, this article beat the Ultimate Sacrifice with 1,317 words!

The idea of Mr. Right popped in my head. Maybe I thought about Bedazzled (2000)? Possibly, Mel Gibson’s Mr. Right role in What Women Want (2000)? After 1,115 words, “Discovering Mr. Right; A Brief Analysis on Idealistic Male Traitsthe best man appeared.

I decided to slow down a bit and reblog a few articles. I helped other fellow bloggers out by sharing their thoughts. It has been a very busy week, so please understand! I am not feeling rusty, just extremely busy.

Now, the most intriguing occurrence? When I started my countdown to my blogiversary, I wrote the following comment:

“Thank you so much for your support for my first month here! I was only a week shy from this milestone with over 1,100 views! That is beyond amazing! I could not imagine what a year would like it!”

Now, imagine that! I was writing this a week ago with over 1,100 views! Check out the stats for my first month thus far:

month

Yeah, did you notice that jump too? We’re talking about an increase of 3,000 viewers within a week!  

Oh, my awards? 

Yeah, I am pretty shocked myself! Thank you so much for all of my followers to support me within my first month here!

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One Month Blogiversary; A Monthly Summary of Success

Which sense would you chose to lose during lovemaking? A response.

Truly inspiring response to my article, “The Ultimate Sacrifice for Love; Makes Sense to Deny Participation.” Thank you so much for going out of your way to respond beyond the comment section. Please, if anyone is interested, write a response as a blog post and I will be more than happy to reblog it for my other viewers to see. It’s always intriguing to find out what everyone else feels about my articles. Just “ping” me, and I’ll find out. Thanks again!

Nefarious Intentions

I stumbled upon (not related to StumbleUpon) Prinze Charming’s blog today, and found an interesting article there, The Ultimate Sacrifice for Love; Makes Sense to Deny Participation, wherein the prinze asks, “Which of your five senses would you give up each time you make love to your lover?”

At first I thought that it would be an all-encompassing loss of the sense. If you chose sight, you would never be able to see again, ever. My answer to his question at this point in my understanding was to become a monk, live in a monastery and play video games for the rest of my life.

As I continued to read the article, I believe his intention is that you would only lose the sense while being intimate with your lover.  The thought of a loss of a sense only while being intimate is actually quite exciting… If I had my choice…

View original post 502 more words

Which sense would you chose to lose during lovemaking? A response.

Dusty Memories; Hoarding Unrequited Love

Dear Jamie, Followers and Passing Bloggers, 

I am writing an article to you in a letter format because I want to effectively convey my thoughts on hoarding our love letters from adolescent years. How long is too long to keep them in a box somewhere up in the attic or down in the basement collecting dust? Should we reconsider scrap-booking to show our own children the days of puppy love?

In an era of technological change in communication, who considers themselves as a pen pal anymore? The cost for postal stamps is the catalyst hindering a traditional form of expression and admiration. Family and friends are now sending out Christmas postcards with a recent family picture as the postcard image. How many Christmas cards will you be sending out this year? Do you think Santa will feel the burden of the U.S. Postal Service? Children will have to save their wish lists on their computers and electronically send them out in time for Santa’s delivery!

The military families experience tedious battles of long distant relationships with the exchange of letters. There is also an exchange of uncertainty and fear, imagining that this letter could be the last one sent from them. I would like to take this moment to acknowledge the troops and their families. God bless you all for the strength and patience that you have achieved over the last few years. Stay strong and come back home soon.

Conveniently logging on to the Internet is a matter of seconds, the anticipation for another letter in the mail is invaluable. I was only twelve years old when I started chatting online in AOL chat rooms. There were only a few friends that wanted to write to me and send me a couple awkward school pictures enclosed in their letters. A decade later, I am still in contact with only two of those young women. They both have amazing partners, and I wish them the best of luck.

It is unfortunate that you cannot meet everyone you have known for several years over the Internet. However, you make the best of it in any situation and communicate with each other every other day.

In The Notebook (2004), a romantic love story between a poor, passionate man and a young, beautiful rich woman has changed the film industry forever. Allie Hamilton and Noah Calhoun face the challenges of a long distant relationship and the ineffective communication limited to the exchange of 365 written letters – every day for a year.

I have several letters from wonderful people across the United States. If I counted them all, I doubt I have more than three hundred of them. I have their love notes, adorably embarrassing pictures, and cards from different holidays. In high school, I have exchanged letters and notes throughout the school day with my peers. After going back down Memory Lane, I realized that I would feel empty and lost inside if I threw away everything. I could never detach myself from the homemade birthday cards to the letters suggesting that “I screwed your sister cause you’ re not worthy of my bangage [sic]!” The preserved inside jokes and the untold stories can bring back more than just rekindled emotions. You cannot relive the past, but you can carry the best experiences with you, especially if they are in written form. The minute you read a letter from the past or possibly right after a break-up, you have to ask yourself how you feel about keeping these letters of sentimental value. Would you rather let the past slip away through your fingers or do you frame the experiences that helped you become who you are today?

Saying Goodbye

How do we remove something from our lives that holds so much sentimental value? How can we replace those empty boxes that held the best written stories stocked up awaiting for another rainy day to enjoy them? Would you reconsider writing a romance novel from them?

Kalisha Buckhanon, author of Upstate, introduces a powerful and motivating love story told through the exchange of letters between a young teenage couple, Antonio and Natasha, during the 1990’s in New York. While Antonio’s accusation for a shocking crime went viral, the love for each other was also being testified. How long will absence grow the heart fonder? Well, I am not much of a spoiler when I review books, but Buckhanon conveys a poetic image at the end of her story when Natasha decides whether she will keep the letters or toss them away. It is a very intriguing book. If you did not read this in high school, please do it now.

Shredded Love, Toasted Hearts

Many businesses and households are buying shredders to remove their confidential documents and legal records for anyone who decides to rummage through the recycle bin. This temporary shred will only cut the paper in multiple strips, while another trend of removing personal documents may just spark an idea.

My dad is a pyromaniac who has managed to slip away from becoming an arsonist by following town ordinances on fire safety. I believe fire would be more of a symbolic and temporary rush. It would be poetic in the sense where a temporary burning desire starts off slow across the pieces of paper, eventually engulfed with warmth and rage. Then, the letters shrivel up and deteriorate into ashes. Whether you felt that the relationship would still have the potential to rekindle or not, that is entirely your decision. It is never too late to rekindle potential feelings, unless there is significant emotional damage and baggage from that relationship. If you know it would be a waste of time, push it aside.

I am not ready to burn a part of my past, but I do move on from everything that has happened. I can burn my research papers, but I would never analyze how much my writing has improved in the last eight years. I can burn everything I have received from past relationships, excluding materialistic gifts, but I cannot shred or burn the sentimental value that everything uniquely has on its own. Yes, Teddy, you’re still staying with me.

If something written to you a while ago still grabs you and hugs you tight, why should you let that go? Embrace those feelings and return back to them when you need them the most. If you kept something from the past that causes conflict in your current relationship or lifestyle, step away from the risks involved. Whether you are obsessively stalking someone on Facebook or Twitter, or telling their partners that they still care about you and not them, consider yourself warned.

Don’t Hate, Donate

If you have materialistic items from your past sitting on your bed since the first time you received them, keep them. If they are still in great condition,  stuffed animals are always welcomed for a generous donation to children hospitals or daycare centers. Ask around and see where you can drop them off. Although I would also consider having a yard sale, most of the people who stop by here in my neighborhood are looking for pet toys. Unless you have a sadistic sense of humor, I would suggest reserving Mr. Snuggles for a child who really wants him to come home that day. I am sure Mr. Snuggles would not mind at all, especially far away as possible  from the other misfit toys that still linger from your childhood.

Do you still have love letters, teddy bears or their jacket you borrowed? Comment below and tell me all about it!

Also, ask yourself if you could take those items and dispose of them properly, how would you do it? Did you remove them from your life before? How did you do it, and would you change the way you took matters in your own hands?

Until next time, take care.

Sincerely, 

Tony 

Dusty Memories; Hoarding Unrequited Love

Bloggers I Like

It is an honor, and a new friendship. My blog has been recently added on cherispeak‘s Bloggers I Like page, providing the warmest feedback ever given to me on WordPress.com. This amazing woman, with a heart full of gold, has mentioned the following for the world to see:

“An amazing blog of gentlemanly and sensual writings that men could learn from and women will melt from. All that aside, Tony is hands down one of the best writers I have ever had the pleasure of reading in my life. Considering I have read millions or even billions of words, this is saying a lot!” 

Thank you, and everyone else who feels the same way. I am looking forward on staying here to grow and develop together as a hopeless romantic community seeking for those dark hidden places that shelter and isolate our passionate sides from within. I must release those absent sides, and help everyone shine their fullest capabilities in the most commonly ignored vacant spaces. Whether they are between your fingers or between your arms, embrace. Take care, love and everyone reading. Thank you so much for your time!

Bloggers I Like

Blog of the year awards and nominations! Thank you! Revised

Blog of the Year Award banner 600

Presented by iamforchange:

Blog of the year awards and nominations Thank you! Revised.

   

My message back to him:

“Wow, I am speechless! Thank you so much for this nomination! I am only three days shy of my one month anniversary here, and I am nearly 2,300 views of all time. This is a great pleasure to grow and develop with the WordPress community by exchanging my words of love, wisdom and hope in today’s society. As a recent graduate at the University of Connecticut, journalism was least of my expectations. However, I do miss my intensive twenty page research papers, and then blogging successfully became a remedy for that. I’m extremely pleased with this nomination, and I look forward on receiving more stars! The more stars I receive, the more eyes to mesmerize upon a poetic night of glistening inspiration and determination. Take care, sir.”

I would also like to thank,  thethoughtpalette.co.uk for this opportunity. This truly inspires me to write more!

Beyond Words Can Explain

Now, let me acknowledge the ones who have become a significant impact in my life. The people whom I always come back to my blog because they offer inspiration and support to continue writing. Yes, you followers. I have reached triple digit followers and nearly 2,300 views of all time in less than a month. That blows my mind away with so much warmth and acceptance. That allows the distinction within the community, not as another blog, but that blog. The blog that inspired many other inspiring people within days!

If you have someone to nominate this year, please spread the word!

I will be more than pleased if I received all six stars!

Thank you all once again for your love and support.

Blog of the Year Award 1 star jpeg

Blog of the year awards and nominations! Thank you! Revised

No Strings Attached Snuggling; The Trending Sensual Intentions Surrounded by Sexual Misconceptions

You are most likely a hopeless romantic following my blog for an instant emotional and intellectual connection within yourself. My recent blog posts may have helped you release your daily stress from work, school or taking care of children. Possibly, you could have all three of those emotional burdens hindering some time alone for yourself. You may argue that you do manage your time wisely to schedule personal time alone from reality, however it is only limited to meals, showers and sleep. It is unfortunate that my presence is absent to fulfill your innermost desire for physical touch and the embrace of two bodies with legs intertwined by engaging in no strings attached snuggling. There is a guarantee that you can find someone else who will make you completely comfortable with that taboo concept of snuggling with strangers.  You may decline to take part in the latest trend to market your snuggling skills as a professional cuddler, like the woman in New York who owns The Snuggery, but there are people willing to snuggle free of charge.

Jacqueline, the founder of The Snuggery, has a chart provided on her website that discloses the rates and services. You can have a complete hour with her for only a dollar a minute. If you choose 45 minutes, you lose $5 for jumping off the bed too soon. Do you have a ménage à trois preference? You can double the cuddle ratio for twice as much for another professional cuddler to join you. Honestly, two people can save $180 to cuddle with me for more than 180 minutes. Yes, this is a personal advertisement, please ask for applications in the comment section below. I will also mention that age is just a number because snuggling is not sexual, it is sensual.

The concept of no strings attached snuggling has stirred up some controversial questioning on the sensual vs. sexual debate. My primary focus is to step into the cold shower from the last three posts that I have written and focus on the sexual misconceptions of no strings attached snuggling. I will also be laying out the differences between sensual play vs. sexual play to help refine those questionable areas. I define play as participating in an active role in having consensual fun

First, let us step away from imagining the vulnerable dependency with our five traditional senses in the bedroom. Secondly, let us put aside the Lover’s Christmas List which perfectly transitioned into the most explicitly written post. We can go back to the seductive sensualist approach later. I hope all of those posts relaxed you to reconnect with your comfort zone and allow you to sleep well for the night you read them.

What is no strings attached snuggling? How is it different engaging in sex with no strings attached? How do you lay out the rules and restrictions for no strings attached snuggling? How can you say that snuggling does not lead to sex, while many others arguably say that spooning does?  How will I ever be sure to find someone who will respect me and my decision to only subject myself to platonic snuggling? Should I let them caress my shoulders or arms? Should we hold hands and occasionally massage each other’s wrists and fingers? What happens when the person takes an advantage of me? Do I slap them? These are only a few of the questions that arise around this trending sensation. I will try my best to answer all the ones I mentioned and hopefully clear up the sexual misconceptions surrounded by this sensual activity.

According to UrbanDictionary.com, no strings attached snuggling is accurately defined:

Snuggling or sleeping together with no real intention of having any intimate time. Can turn sexual by accident but generally just a platonic relationship for the mutal [sic] benifit [sic] of enjoying sleep while being close to someone. More common in winter, where single men and women attempt to keep warm. Sometimes wrongly interpreted as Friends with benifits [sic].  No strings attached snuggling wether  [sic] platonic or not generally has no after-sleep awkwardness or strings.

Although snuggling does not necessarily mean sleeping, it does lead into being relaxed and comfortable with each other which may result to falling asleep in each other’s arms. If you cannot fall asleep, but simply embrace this temporary physical bond that you two have created, you might be stuck in a place where you are wide awake in the early morning right before your parents wake up for their caffeine fix. Hopefully they can accept your “sleep over” by avoiding the twenty questions of whether or not seeing you sleeping next to someone else was just as they perceived it, especially in your bed. If you are a male in your twenties, questioning protection will definitely be top priority. If you are a young woman, this great idea for a sleep over was not the best decision after all. If you are much older, out on your own, there really isn’t much to worry about other than waking up to the weekend with someone physically appealing. Go back to bed and let them stay where they are.

Now, intimacy is a different path to understand. If you have snuggled with your best friend for a while, you cannot say that you have no intimacy within that relationship. Intimacy requires a closer relationship with the person by effectively understanding them better through warmth and affection. As an experienced person with no strings attached snuggling, I have a tendency to show warmth and affection regardless if I barely know them. I do it under the consensual conditions that we are both relaxed, comfortable and willing to exchange little perks of affection to help relieve stress and entice the release of hormones throughout the body, like serotonin. The feeling of physical and emotional compatibility will generally offer more affection to those who fit my qualifications. If I go out of my way to become more affectionate, understand that I have feelings for you. This is only common when I have a strong attraction for you earlier in stages of our relationship, or a gradual acceptance over a few months of spending time together. Everyone has different perceptions on intimacy, however it is entirely up to them to talk about what they can and will not accept when you snuggle together. Discuss this with them and find out all the restrictions. Maybe they will allow forehead kisses, Eskimo kisses, cheek kisses, butterfly kisses, and chin kisses. Communication cannot be emphasized enough – just talk to them.

According to the Snuggery’s Policies and FAQ, there is a mandatory first meeting time before you experience snuggling with Jacqueline to discuss these same policies and make sure the clients are comfortable in pursuing your intentions for no strings attached snuggling. She does reassure you that  “although sexual activity is not permitted,” she mentions that arousal is “perfectly normal and should not make anyone feel uncomfortable.” The exchange of communication is also mentioned, and should only be up your personal preference whether you wish to talk during your session or not. Yes, everyone has their own personal preferences for everything they do, especially when they subject themselves to something physically and emotionally mutual. However, we must control ourselves with platonic intentions, unless you wish to pursue the sensual intentions mentioned earlier. I would recommend it if you are completely aware of the situation and how you both will move on from this experience without being emotionally hurt. Discuss the circumstances and the “what-if” scenarios. If you knew that you would crave more of their sensual touch after that night, leaving you left with unrequited love or the lack of a mutual exchange, you will definitely feel left out. Be extra careful with your feelings on this one. I will also emphasize that you should never do something or say something that you know will cause a significant impact on their emotions and feelings. This is not a moment to lead anyone on. That is the least of their concerns. Although it might sound ideal to just embrace  sleeping with someone with no other intentions, people will seek more options to explore. Discuss this with either the person you barely know or your lover for that cuddle session. Your boyfriend or girlfriend may take an advantage, but that does not necessarily mean it is right. Let them know. This also goes with marital concerns. Please understand the controversial topic of  marital rape. It is a matter of self-control and being assertive. Lay out the barriers, respect each other’s requests, and do not attempt to alter any decisions. If you have animals, why would you decline their offers? We all know you are comfortable about this one! Just take it and appreciate it! Your bundle of fur will hold a grudge if you ignore them. I suppose that also goes to everyone else.

How can you say that snuggling does not lead to sex? Communication.  Draw the fine lines between sexual and sensual. Kissing does not necessarily have to lead to sex either. Chocolate covered strawberries are also blamed for enticing something sexual to occur. Is it your boyfriend, girlfriend or spouse? Just communicate. Tell them to cool it down and accept it as it is. Is it a summer fling, no strings attached night out on the couch, or someone temporary? You may barely know each other, but be open about this now. Lay out your expectations! Yes, if you spoon with someone, it may cause some arousal. Embrace it as a product of your emotions. Never use it to your advantage. Discuss and convey everything about yourselves. Why would you even bother to ignore important information like that?

How will I ever be sure to find someone who will respect me and my decision? 

Communication. I cannot emphasize enough on exchanging ideas and concerns with each other.

Should I allow caressing? 

If there is a consensual decision to allow caressing shoulders and arms, let it happen. The feelings will be greatly enhance during your physical embrace. If you are willing to hold each other’s hands, occasionally massaging their wrists and fingers, discuss this with them. Honestly, if you are not looking forward to feeling the extra perks of snuggling with someone, grab a pillow!

Lastly, when is the caressing too much? How do I let them know that I am uncomfortable?

Everyone has boundaries and expectations. Do not cross over the boundaries by violating the expectations. You should have laid out the rules and expectations before you decided to snuggle with each other. Guys, your sexual arousal is completely natural. Do not assume to share the latest news that recently popped up – literally. Ladies,  your sexual arousal is completely natural. Do not assume it is completely fine to entice the moment by slowly grinding against him. You are officially a tease. Most guys would love to feel that tease, but others may take it the wrong way. If they take an advantage of you by allowing their hands to wander, stop them. That simple. If you are in relationship with them, never feel obligated that you should continue. Yes, although they might enjoy it, just slap them.

Snuggling is a sensual act of two bodies pressed closed together. You want to feel their warmth through the exchange of body heat. You crave that security blanket of physical and emotional sensation of being with someone. Try it out with everyone you feel comfortable inviting into your personal space. I am always interested in rekindling high school crushes or finding someone brand new to share these warm urges during the holiday season. We are all mammals craving for that sensational feeling of physical touch. Embrace the opportunity, improve the experience. Friends will refer to what you are doing as “friends with benefits” while you can reassure to them that they are friends with explorative opportunities. Although I will not dive into the concept around friends with benefits, I will briefly explain sensual play vs. sexual play. I define play as participating in an active role in having consensual funSensual play can lead into foreplay, but it is not necessarily mandatory for this moment. A sensualist craves stimulating their senses, while sexual play has overwhelmingly taken over everyone’s mind to assume that sensual is sexual. The appreciation for the act of snuggling can push aside the idea that being sexual is a catalytic spark that can suddenly deteriorate relationships.  When someone finally realizes that there is so much more to a relationship than being in the bedroom, communication improves the growth and development of everything established.


A Mini How-To Guide on Snuggling Improvement 

How do I improve snuggling? Well, simply embrace the S.N.U.G. 

Socialize. Pillow talk without the post-sexual feeling.

Negotiate. Ask for more time, ask for a closer position, and talk about places outside the house for snuggling.

Understand. Just stop, and admire. Understand what their body is telling you. Watch non-verbal cues through their eyes and facial expressions.

Gather. Take all the mental notes you can. Never assume that you know everything. Knowledge is power, especially when you notice the smallest details and then bring them up in the next conversation. They will be very surprised that you bothered to pay close attention. That shows a sign of being a priority over being an option.

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No Strings Attached Snuggling; The Trending Sensual Intentions Surrounded by Sexual Misconceptions

No Strings Attached Snuggling; The Trending Sensual Intentions Surrounded by Sexual Misconceptions

You are most likely a hopeless romantic following my blog for an instant emotional and intellectual connection within yourself. My recent blog posts may have helped you release your daily stress from work, school or taking care of children. Possibly, you could have all three of those emotional burdens hindering some time alone for yourself. You may argue that you do manage your time wisely to schedule personal time alone from reality, however it is only limited to meals, showers and sleep. It is unfortunate that my presence is absent to fulfill your innermost desire for physical touch and the embrace of two bodies with legs intertwined by engaging in no strings attached snuggling. There is a guarantee that you can find someone else who will make you completely comfortable with that taboo concept of snuggling with strangers.  You may decline to take part in the latest trend to market your snuggling skills as a professional cuddler, like the woman in New York who owns The Snuggery, but there are people willing to snuggle free of charge.

Jacqueline, the founder of The Snuggery, has a chart provided on her website that discloses the rates and services. You can have a complete hour with her for only a dollar a minute. If you choose 45 minutes, you lose $5 for jumping off the bed too soon. Do you have a ménage à trois preference? You can double the cuddle ratio for twice as much for another professional cuddler to join you. Honestly, two people can save $180 to cuddle with me for more than 180 minutes. Yes, this is a personal advertisement, please ask for applications in the comment section below. I will also mention that age is just a number because snuggling is not sexual, it is sensual.

The concept of no strings attached snuggling has stirred up some controversial questioning on the sensual vs. sexual debate. My primary focus is to step into the cold shower from the last three posts that I have written and focus on the sexual misconceptions of no strings attached snuggling. I will also be laying out the differences between sensual play vs. sexual play to help refine those questionable areas. I define play as participating in an active role in having consensual fun

First, let us step away from imagining the vulnerable dependency with our five traditional senses in the bedroom. Secondly, let us put aside the Lover’s Christmas List which perfectly transitioned into the most explicitly written post. We can go back to the seductive sensualist approach later. I hope all of those posts relaxed you to reconnect with your comfort zone and allow you to sleep well for the night you read them.

What is no strings attached snuggling? How is it different engaging in sex with no strings attached? How do you lay out the rules and restrictions for no strings attached snuggling? How can you say that snuggling does not lead to sex, while many others arguably say that spooning does?  How will I ever be sure to find someone who will respect me and my decision to only subject myself to platonic snuggling? Should I let them caress my shoulders or arms? Should we hold hands and occasionally massage each other’s wrists and fingers? What happens when the person takes an advantage of me? Do I slap them? These are only a few of the questions that arise around this trending sensation. I will try my best to answer all the ones I mentioned and hopefully clear up the sexual misconceptions surrounded by this sensual activity.

According to UrbanDictionary.com, no strings attached snuggling is accurately defined:

“Snuggling or sleeping together with no real intention of having any intimate time. Can turn sexual by accident but generally just a platonic relationship for the mutal [sic] benifit [sic] of enjoying sleep while being close to someone. More common in winter, where single men and women attempt to keep warm. Sometimes wrongly interpreted as Friends with benifits [sic].  No strings attached snuggling wether  [sic] platonic or not generally has no after-sleep awkwardness or strings.

Although snuggling does not necessarily mean sleeping, it does lead into being relaxed and comfortable with each other which may result to falling asleep in each other’s arms. If you cannot fall asleep, but simply embrace this temporary physical bond that you two have created, you might be stuck in a place where you are wide awake in the early morning right before your parents wake up for their caffeine fix. Hopefully they can accept your “sleep over” by avoiding the twenty questions of whether or not seeing you sleeping next to someone else was just as they perceived it, especially in your bed. If you are a male in your twenties, questioning protection will definitely be top priority. If you are a young woman, this great idea for a sleep over was not the best decision after all. If you are much older, out on your own, there really isn’t much to worry about other than waking up to the weekend with someone physically appealing. Go back to bed and let them stay where they are.

Now, intimacy is a different path to understand. If you have snuggled with your best friend for a while, you cannot say that you have no intimacy within that relationship. Intimacy requires a closer relationship with the person by effectively understanding them better through warmth and affection. As an experienced person with no strings attached snuggling, I have a tendency to show warmth and affection regardless if I barely know them. I do it under the consensual conditions that we are both relaxed, comfortable and willing to exchange little perks of affection to help relieve stress and entice the release of hormones throughout the body, like serotonin. The feeling of physical and emotional compatibility will generally offer more affection to those who fit my qualifications. If I go out of my way to become more affectionate, understand that I have feelings for you. This is only common when I have a strong attraction for you earlier in stages of our relationship, or a gradual acceptance over a few months of spending time together. Everyone has different perceptions on intimacy, however it is entirely up to them to talk about what they can and will not accept when you snuggle together. Discuss this with them and find out all the restrictions. Maybe they will allow forehead kisses, Eskimo kisses, cheek kisses, butterfly kisses, and chin kisses. Communication cannot be emphasized enough – just talk to them.

According to the Snuggery’s Policies and FAQ, there is a mandatory first meeting time before you experience snuggling with Jacqueline to discuss these same policies and make sure the clients are comfortable in pursuing your intentions for no strings attached snuggling. She does reassure you that  “although sexual activity is not permitted,” she mentions that arousal is “perfectly normal and should not make anyone feel uncomfortable.” The exchange of communication is also mentioned, and should only be up your personal preference whether you wish to talk during your session or not. Yes, everyone has their own personal preferences for everything they do, especially when they subject themselves to something physically and emotionally mutual. However, we must control ourselves with platonic intentions, unless you wish to pursue the sensual intentions mentioned earlier. I would recommend it if you are completely aware of the situation and how you both will move on from this experience without being emotionally hurt. Discuss the circumstances and the “what-if” scenarios. If you knew that you would crave more of their sensual touch after that night, leaving you left with unrequited love or the lack of a mutual exchange, you will definitely feel left out. Be extra careful with your feelings on this one. I will also emphasize that you should never do something or say something that you know will cause a significant impact on their emotions and feelings. This is not a moment to lead anyone on. That is the least of their concerns. Although it might sound ideal to just embrace  sleeping with someone with no other intentions, people will seek more options to explore. Discuss this with either the person you barely know or your lover for that cuddle session. Your boyfriend or girlfriend may take an advantage, but that does not necessarily mean it is right. Let them know. This also goes with marital concerns. Please understand the controversial topic of  marital rape. It is a matter of self-control and being assertive. Lay out the barriers, respect each other’s requests, and do not attempt to alter any decisions. If you have animals, why would you decline their offers? We all know you are comfortable about this one! Just take it and appreciate it! Your bundle of fur will hold a grudge if you ignore them. I suppose that also goes to everyone else.

How can you say that snuggling does not lead to sex? Communication.  Draw the fine lines between sexual and sensual. Kissing does not necessarily have to lead to sex either. Chocolate covered strawberries are also blamed for enticing something sexual to occur. Is it your boyfriend, girlfriend or spouse? Just communicate. Tell them to cool it down and accept it as it is. Is it a summer fling, no strings attached night out on the couch, or someone temporary? You may barely know each other, but be open about this now. Lay out your expectations! Yes, if you spoon with someone, it may cause some arousal. Embrace it as a product of your emotions. Never use it to your advantage. Discuss and convey everything about yourselves. Why would you even bother to ignore important information like that?

How will I ever be sure to find someone who will respect me and my decision? 

Communication. I cannot emphasize enough on exchanging ideas and concerns with each other.

Should I allow caressing? 

If there is a consensual decision to allow caressing shoulders and arms, let it happen. The feelings will be greatly enhance during your physical embrace. If you are willing to hold each other’s hands, occasionally massaging their wrists and fingers, discuss this with them. Honestly, if you are not looking forward to feeling the extra perks of snuggling with someone, grab a pillow!

Lastly, when is the caressing too much? How do I let them know that I am uncomfortable?

Everyone has boundaries and expectations. Do not cross over the boundaries by violating the expectations. You should have laid out the rules and expectations before you decided to snuggle with each other. Guys, your sexual arousal is completely natural. Do not assume to share the latest news that recently popped up – literally. Ladies,  your sexual arousal is completely natural. Do not assume it is completely fine to entice the moment by slowly grinding against him. You are officially a tease. Most guys would love to feel that tease, but others may take it the wrong way. If they take an advantage of you by allowing their hands to wander, stop them. That simple. If you are in relationship with them, never feel obligated that you should continue. Yes, although they might enjoy it, just slap them.

Snuggling is a sensual act of two bodies pressed closed together. You want to feel their warmth through the exchange of body heat. You crave that security blanket of physical and emotional sensation of being with someone. Try it out with everyone you feel comfortable inviting into your personal space. I am always interested in rekindling high school crushes or finding someone brand new to share these warm urges during the holiday season. We are all mammals craving for that sensational feeling of physical touch. Embrace the opportunity, improve the experience. Friends will refer to what you are doing as “friends with benefits” while you can reassure to them that they are friends with explorative opportunities. Although I will not dive into the concept around friends with benefits, I will briefly explain sensual play vs. sexual play. I define play as participating in an active role in having consensual funSensual play can lead into foreplay, but it is not necessarily mandatory for this moment. A sensualist craves stimulating their senses, while sexual play has overwhelmingly taken over everyone’s mind to assume that sensual is sexual. The appreciation for the act of snuggling can push aside the idea that being sexual is a catalytic spark that can suddenly deteriorate relationships.  When someone finally realizes that there is so much more to a relationship than being in the bedroom, communication improves the growth and development of everything established.

A Mini How-To Guide on Snuggling Improvement 

How do I improve snuggling? Well, simply embrace the S.N.U.G. 

Socialize. Pillow talk without the post-sexual feeling.

Negotiate. Ask for more time, ask for a closer position, and talk about places outside the house for snuggling.

Understand. Just stop, and admire. Understand what their body is telling you. Watch non-verbal cues through their eyes and facial expressions.

Gather. Take all the mental notes you can. Never assume that you know everything. Knowledge is power, especially when you notice the smallest details and then bring them up in the next conversation. They will be very surprised that you bothered to pay close attention. That shows a sign of being a priority over being an option.

No Strings Attached Snuggling; The Trending Sensual Intentions Surrounded by Sexual Misconceptions